Cat on my lap

Pache decided to grace me with his presence when I left for the high school yesterday morning. Surely the cold weather brought him back for some warmth, so I picked him up at the front door and carried him to the garage where he spent the day with Guinny and Bobby.

But Pache doesn't like the cold garage. When the back door is closed and he can't dart outside, he prefers to be with me, just as in the old days when my lap was his security blanket. Last night he sauntered into my messy office, mewed to me his royal presence, and jumped on my lap as if that were his entitlement. He then lay in a curled position dreaming of mice and birds as I held him close.

Cats make great lap warmers on cold nights and cold mornings. Pache doesn't purr (I never had a Siamese that purred), but he still shows his contentment as he kneads my legs, my chest, my back when he can get to it. I am no fool, though, and know the reason why Pache is so affectionate to me now is because he appreciates my warm lap, and how my fleshy thighs conform to his small body.

There is something therapeutic about having a cat on one's lap, though. As he lays there in his furry crescent shape, I subconsciously stroke his soft fur, gliding my fingers over old scabs or deeply-buried seed heads from desert flora. He likes that. He stretches his body out to let me get to his abdomen, although he does hiss at me if I pet him right below his ribs and for a weak moment turns into the Cat from Hell before resuming his more innocent kitten-like demeanor. I am his owner and I am the only one he snuggles up with. Having his safely in my lap means he's not outside in danger of predators and other dangers.

I know that one day Pache won't be with me anymore. His deep desire to be a roaming outside cat concerns me. I never feel relaxed when he is outside. His insistence to be an outside cat bothers me. What did I do wrong to chase him away? Do we have too many other cats? Do the dogs annoy him? Is he simply too good for this house? I wish I knew the answer to his most secretive of feline desires.